Nathan 2025 Mona Lisa

 

 Use the wonderful TedED from class as the source and inspiration for your required essay.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRK_uCMwZPY&t=8s

If you use any other sources, you must also KWO them, AND be sure to reference them at the bottom of your essay.

Insert pictures of your KWO into the homework doc you submit.

Indicate 1 of every BB, 7 OPs, 3 Enhancements, 1 M3

If you are new to this class, do what you understand -- leave me a note to remind me that you have not had the depth of instruction that others have.

CHECKLIST required

All regular formatting required. Double space, indent, proper title block, Merriweather 11 or 12 point, proper indications

NO BWs, contractions, or dialogue

Nathan

MARIGOLD 💛 (Happy Valentine’s Day!)

2/16/25

HW

Popularity by Theft

by

Nathan

The Mona Lisa is arguably the most famous painting in the world. (3)Currently hanging in the Louvre, it has experienced countless events since its creation 500 years ago. (4-SHADOW)Despite exhibiting many revolutionary techniques inspired by Leonardo Da Vinci’s work on optics, the Mona Lisa might not be such an icon if not for one fateful day.

While the origin of the Mona Lisa has been lost to history, it is thought that Da Vinci painted a portrait of Lisa Gherardini at the request of her husband, a Florence businessman. (9)To have a portrait of yourself was an honor. It took over a decade to complete, which does not mean Gherardini sat still in a chair for 10 years. (4)Using his newfound knowledge of optics, Leonardo pioneered several artistic techniques that are shown in the Mona Lisa. “Atmospheric perspective” provides an illusion of depth by blurring the background progressively as distance increases. “Sfumato”, meaning “smoked off” in English, softens edges on a painting by a gradual change in color. (8)Perfectionism overtook him, and Da Vinci considered the painting to be incomplete as he lay on his deathbed in 1519. (2)Despite his personal opinion, many considered the Mona Lisa to be an extraordinary piece from the Renaissance era. One of the best, but not yet the most iconic.

After Da Vinci’s passing, King Francois I of France bought the Mona Lisa and displayed it to the awe of his subjects. In 1550, Giorgio Vasari released an extremely popular biography on various Renaissance artists, Da Vinci included. (S)Vasari described the Mona Lisa as a “hypnotic imitation of life”, and the painting quickly became the centerpiece of the French Royal Collection, an enviable possession in the eyes of many. The Mona Lisa continued to stay in French hands, watching over Napoleon's bedroom before being transferred to its current location in the Louvre. By this time, it was extremely popular and among the most visited locations in the world. Tourists were lining up just to catch a glimpse of the famed painting. (M3-n.)It helped that various European scholars jumped on the hype train, with over-the-top comments about its smile, lips, gaze, and beauty. By the 1900s, it was the main attraction of the Louvre, but it still had yet to become a household name. The person that really catapulted it into the history books was a little Italian man by the name of Vincenzo Peruggia. And by little, I mean little. (6)The dude was 5’3”!

Funnily enough, the Mona Lisa was just 10 inches off of being the same height as Peruggia, which meant he would have had a hard time smuggling it out of the Louvre. In fact, he was almost caught! Just as the sun was rising in Paris on August 21, 1911, Peruggia snatched the painting from its place on the wall as the rest of the artworks could do nothing but watch. (1)Because of his job as a case designer for the Louvre, he had access to the museum at that time of day. However, the exit he had planned to use was locked, and footsteps were quickly approaching from the staircase. (5)As Peruggia braced for the worst, a voice spoke in a bright tone. “Ah, Monsieur Peruggia! (Q)Are you trying to leave? Sorry about that, the doors are locked for security reasons. Here, let me help.” The workman unlocked the exit and Peruggia thanked the unsuspecting guard before slipping out into the night.

The theft quickly made international headlines. Peruggio was interviewed because of his job at the Louvre but was never suspected. Pablo Picasso, on the other hand, was suspected to be the thief. The Mona Lisa was hidden in a false-bottom suitcase for two years before Peruggia decided to leave for Italy. (7)Convinced he was an Italian patriot returning a national treasure, Peruggio was planning to make a lot of money off of the Mona Lisa. Instead, he was arrested almost immediately after stepping foot in Italy, and the famed painting was sent right back to the Louvre. This two-year absence really elevated the Mona Lisa to another level. In the 100 years since the 1911 heist, it has been referenced in pop culture countless times. Now, the Mona Lisa is housed in the Louvre inside a bulletproof, earthquake-proof case, unaffected by the chaos of the millions of people that swarm it every day.

---

BUILDING BLOCKs

w/w - …complete, which does not… (P2)

ly - …the background progressively… (P2)

bc - …was interviewed because of his… (P5)

asia - …events since its creation… (P1)

prep - …bedroom before being… (P3)

PA - …thanked the unsuspecting… (P4)
VV - …really catapulted it into… (P3)

OPENERs

(S)Vasari described the Mona Lisa… (P3)

(1)Because of his job as a case… (P4)

(2)Despite his personal opinion… (P2)

(3)Currently hanging in the Louvre… (P1)

(4)Using his newfound knowledge… (P2)

(5)As Peruggia braced for the worst… (P4)

(6)The dude was 5’3”! (P3)

(7)Convinced he was an Italian… (P5)

(8)Perfectionism overtook him… (P2)

(9)To have a portrait of yourself… (P2)

(10)N/A

(11e)N/A

(11d)N/A

ENHANCEMENTs

(4-SHADOW)Despite exhibiting… (P1)

(HYP)“Ah, Monsieur Peruggia!...” (P4)

(Q)Are you trying to leave? (P4)

[NEW!] (HYP) - a hypothetical but historically based interaction

(might be considered (HIS))

M3s

(M3-n.)…comments about its smile, lips, gaze, and beauty. (P3)

Olivia 2025 Litmus Test

Write a fiction essay

Indicate

1 of each BUILDING BLOCK

1 of each OPENER

5 ENHANCEMENTS

NO banned words, contractions, or dialogue

DOUBLE SPACE (using the tool bar)

Indent where appropriate

CHECKLIST required

(-10 if missing) NAME: Olivia Liu

(1) Because the house remained still, Sarah felt an unsettling tension in the air. The silence made her heart race, and she could not shake the feeling that something was approaching. (7) Edged by the fading light, Sarah stood frozen in place.

(2) In the corner of the room, the old clock ticked loudly, marking each second as though time itself was slowing down. (S)It seemed almost out of place, yet it contributed to the room’s somber atmosphere. (3) Eagerly, Sarah approached the window. The sun was descending, casting an eerie orange glow over the empty streets. She felt a strange pull, as if something was summoning her. (10)Silent shadows loomed, stretching across the floor.(4) Watching the shadows stretch across the walls, Sarah felt a wave of unease. There was no rational explanation for her anxiety, but she could not dismiss it. (5) Although it appeared calm outside, something felt amiss. (SIM)The place was quiet, yet a subtle urgency filled the air, which felt like a moment before a storm.

Sarah moved quickly, her feet barely grazing the floor as she rushed toward the door. It was almost as though an invisible force was urging her to leave. She had to escape because staying would only bring more danger.

The wind began to howl through the trees, and Sarah felt the cold air seep through the cracks in the door. It was not just chilly, it was a warning. The dark clouds loomed overhead, growing thicker by the minute. Heavy and ominous, they mirrored her own thoughts.

A knock at the door suddenly made Sarah freeze. The sound was sharp and unexpected, as though something had just been severed. (Q)What would she discover if she opened the door? She was not sure if she was ready to face the truth. (11d)The knock at the door grew louder, sharper—knock, knock—demanding her attention. 

(MET)The silence that followed suffocated the room, as though it weighed down on her chest. (8)Fear seemed to wrap itself around the room, making every breath harder to take.

The figure at the door was silent, standing perfectly still, as though waiting for Sarah to make the first move. (11e)Fear clouded her mind, and in the end, only fear remained.

(9)To open the door would be to confront the unknown. But something deep inside urged her to act.(T/C-VSS) Sarah’s heart raced, yet she knew she had no choice. She could not delay any longer. It was time to face what lay beyond the door.

(4-SHADOW) Sarah had an overwhelming sense that this moment would change everything. She did not know how, but the door, once opened, would show something that would alter her life forever. (6) It was inevitable.

What You Did Exceptionally Well:

1. Mood and Tone Are Impeccable
You’ve completely nailed the eerie, tense atmosphere. Lines like:

“The silence that followed suffocated the room, as though it weighed down on her chest.”
and
“The wind began to howl... it was not just chilly, it was a warning.”
create a sense of impending dread that’s cinematic.

2. Sensory and Figurative Language
Your simile:

“like a moment before a storm,”
and your metaphor:
“Fear seemed to wrap itself around the room,”
both heighten the suspense and make Sarah’s experience more visceral.

3. Structural Flow and Pacing
You did a great job layering the action and emotion—each paragraph builds naturally, and the use of short sentences (like "It was inevitable.") provides excellent dramatic impact.

4. Mysterious Ending With Emotional Weight
This section:

“To open the door would be to confront the unknown.”
and
“She had an overwhelming sense that this moment would change everything.”
gives the ending a sense of finality without revealing too much, which is exactly what suspense needs.

---

Suggestions to Sharpen Even More:

1. Clarify This Line a Bit:

“Edged by the fading light, Sarah stood frozen in place.”
Consider:
“Outlined by the fading light, Sarah stood frozen in place.”
or
“Bathed in the fading light, Sarah remained frozen in place.”
Just to improve the visual clarity a bit.

2. Tighten Repetition:

“The knock at the door grew louder, sharper—knock, knock—demanding her attention.”
This is a great moment, but consider trimming: “The knocking grew louder—sharper—demanding her attention.”
to keep the suspense without redundancy.

Although you give up your dicope, it is a stronger sentence. Plus, your dicope was closer to an epizeuxis. Look at the rules for each of those, and ask me if you are not sure of how to create them.

3. Smooth Transitions in Paragraph 5:

“Sarah moved quickly, her feet barely grazing the floor...”
You might transition with something like:
“Driven by instinct, Sarah moved quickly, her feet barely grazing the floor...””
to make the motivation clearer right after describing her rising unease.

---

Final Thoughts:

This reads like the opening scene of a psychological thriller or horror short story. You've mastered tension, pacing, and mood, and your figurative language and emotional build-up are especially strong. Your use of the stylistic techniques is wonderful. It’s honestly ready for submission to a student literary magazine or even a contest with just light revision!

BUILDING BLOCKS 

w/w which felt like a moment
Ly  suddenly made Sarah
Bc because staying would
Asia  as if something Prep through the trees PA Heavy and ominous
VV her feet barely grazing

STARTERS/OPENERS (S) It seemed almost 

 (1) Because the house
(2) In the corner
(3)Eagerly, Sarah
(4)Watching the 

(5) Although it
(6)It was inevitable.

 (7) Edged by the
(8)Fear seemed
(9)To open the
(10)Silent shadows
(11e)Fear clouded her mind
(11d)The knock 

ENHANCEMENTS (SIM)The place was quiet

(MET)The silence that

(Q)What would she discover if she opened the door?

(T/C-VSS) Sarah’s heart  

(4-SHADOW) Sarah had